XENA’S SHOWNOTES #30

==== @PRU INTRO

Hello it’s Saturday 28th Apr 2007 and this is Prurient Lifestyle episode number #030 Please note that the Prurient Lifestyle show and our website may contain references to adult material and explicit language. Therefore this pod-show is not suitable for the younger listener.

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==== @THIS WEEK If you were not aware that the ‘Prurient Lifestyle’ podcast is part of a prurient community checkout www.prurient.co.uk after the show. You can sign up as a member and get access to most areas of the Club site for free.

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In this weeks show we bring you Prurient Club News Music from the Podsafe network Xena talks about Story by Sapphire Round up

A link to my notes for this show can be found on http://prurient.podbean.com

The Podsafe Network provides all Music for the show This week we are doing something slightly different in that both tracks we are featuring are from the same artist Andrew Ryan Bio: Just when you thought the music industry couldn’t get any bleaker, a musician like Andrew Ryan appears on the scene and redefines what it means to be a true artist. As a committed singer, songwriter and musician he is someone that possesses the talent it takes to go all the way to the top. ==== @ Prurient Club News

- new chatroom release version 6.5 - free chatroom client download link can be found at http://www.prurient.co.uk/index-chat.php

As a previous visitor to Erotica, we want you to be the first to know our exciting news:

Dita’s back! Dita Von Teese will be headlining Erotica 2007 with an extraordinary new show. Burlesque’s brightest star is Hot! Hot! Hot! and we know that tickets will sell out quickly. Dita’s world-famous virtuoso performances are enchanting, unforgettable and very erotic. http://www.erotica-uk.com/Home.asp

==== @MUSIC TRACK (1)

About To Break Andrew Ryan

==== @ Xena (talks about)

I am assuming that listeners have heard of the term “Fuck Buddy”. But just in case you haven’t, it’s where single people claim they have someone who they are not involved with but call up when they fancy a shag. Is it the ideal solution for those not in a relationship and safer than 1 night stands with strangers or is it for sad losers?

An article in this month’s Scarlet magazine by Al Needham is very damning of this arrangement.

He says on the surface, the concept of the Fuck Buddy sounds pretty decent a continuous string of one night stands with someone you know isn’t going to murder you. But lets not con ourselves there is not such thing as a no strings relationship. He says “At best, having a fuck buddy is just a shitty relationship masquerading as trendy sex. At worst, its prostitution without money changing hands. Its human nature that one party will always want more than the other and before you know it you’re either stuck with a bastard who won’t commit or being bombarded with obsessive text messages. The writer doesn’t believe that there is no such a thing as long term casual sex and that women who do this are either too messed up for a proper relationship or have such low self esteem they put up with it. He goes on, Lets stop dressing up the art of being pissed about and call it like it is Fuck buddy is shorthand for she/he only wants a shag and does not want you in their life in any other way and he feels that we all deserve better than that.

March 4th Sunday Times magazine Victoria Gill article about polyamorists.

We have talked about this subject on previous pod casts and this article didn’t really reveal anything new but I thought that it was interesting that this alternative lifestyle is now being written about in the mainstream media. The article interviewed various people involved in polyamorous relationships and communities both here and in the US . Apparently Polyamorists are also known as “ethical non monogamists” that’s an interesting and judgemental comment don’t you think? It implies that anyone else’s lifestyle is not ethical. One of those interviewed in this article said that polyamory “fits the man’s lifestyle but with the women’s rules” Well I think that could also be applied equally to swinging, as the women always has the final veto. Polyamory is definitely a more complicated life style to follow. Dealing with jealousy is discussed frequently. In monogamous relationships jealousy can be an issue sometimes, but with polyamory it seems to be a routine topic as part of the relationships. Especially if you are a secondary or you only have 1 partner to focus on at that time even more so. The article about Fuck buddies mentioned having low self-esteem to be a Fuck buddy but I feel that by being secondary you may also have low self-esteem.

The writer also interviews Dr Lyndsey Moore, a counselling psychologist and research fellow in sexuality and emotion at Warwick University. She is ambivalent about polyamory and says “In theory I think the concept is great but I’m not sure whether, as humans, we’re evolved enough to deal with it” and I think that’s where I am on this one. And I think that it equally applies to the Fuck Buddy scenario.

So what do you think?

==== @MUSIC TRACK (2)

Heaven Is Ours Tonight Andrew Ryan

==== Story by Saphhire – the train journey

The train wasn’t full thank god Anne thought as she slid into the seat, she flung her travel bag on the empty table in front of her and got out her newspaper. She glanced up at passers by willing them to keep walking and not sit on the empty seat opposite her. “Go on keep walking” she said to herself as an elderly awkward looking man approached. Anne closed her eyes and counted backwards from ten, by the time she reached seven she was beginning to relax a bit. There was a 3 hour journey until the first stop so if the elderly man passed by her table then at least she would have a few hours on her own and she wouldn’t have to worry about unwanted company until then. The man slowly made his way towards the seat opposite Anne, he looked like a distinguished drop out who was far too long in the tooth to be put off by Anne’s disapproving look. He threw his rucksack on the table and plonked himself down on the seat opposite Ann, looking at her as if willing her to challenge him. “I made it” he said with a big smile, his wise old face wrinkled in amusement. “Please don’t talk to me please” Anne said silently to herself. Anne picked up her newspaper and opened it to hide her face behind it, and also to block herself from the old man. She began to read, but all the time she was angry inside that she hadn’t got the privacy she craved. They were about 20 minutes into the journey and she took a sneaky peek at the man, he seemed to be asleep. “That’s great” she uttered under her breath and smiled broadly as she took in stranger. Her eyes wandered over his face, he seemed a proud figure of a man, white hair covered by a scraggy hat, scruffy clothes yet they didn’t seem out of fashion, her eyes took in his bronzed weather beaten features, he had a lovely smile, even when asleep he looked contented. “Stop it” she scolded herself, she didn’t want to think about the man, in fact she didn’t want to think about men in general, especially Ben, the man she was engaged to. They had a huge row last night and she had thrown her engagement ring at him. That’s why she was now sitting on this train. She neither wanted or needed company today, especially the company of a stranger. The old man began to stir so Anne quickly opened the paper in front of her face again, putting a suitable block between her and him. “Can I get you a coffee” Ann peered over the top of her papers, the mans silvery grey eyes were intently focused on her. “No Thanks”, she uttered sharply “Are you sure, I’m going to the catering carriage myself so I thought I would offer” “No thank you” She snapped. “How many sugars and do you take milk” he continued unfazed by Anne’s sharpness “No Thank you” But he was gone, moving with an agility that surprised Anne. He returned with a steaming cup of coffee and a roll for Anne. “There you go pet” he said and offered her the goodies he had just brought. He thought she looked kind of vulnerable and hoped she would accept his little gift. “Thanks” Anne said, half annoyed and half amused by this strange character. He looked happy as she thanked him and she thought she saw an expression of relief spread across his face. They both began to eat and little by little a conversation struck up, Anne was a little shy at first, Er, her looked up at Anne, Thank you for the coffee and roll, a smile spread across his face and Anne smiled back, a proper smile and thought he seemed rather nice. An hour passed and the conversation eventually got round to why they were travelling and how far they were going. Anne said she was going home to visit her parents and the man, who she now knew to be named Josh was just travelling on, going no where in particular. “You running away” Josh asked her out right, she looked at him and noticed that his full attention and those grey eyes were intently on her. “You don’t have to say, but sometimes its better to tell a stranger about these things” Anne looked at his sincere eyes and thought what the hell. She told him she had been engaged to Ben for the last year, then explained about the blazing row they had the night before, how she threw the ring across the room at him. “I’m not going to contact him” she said with a pout. “This is not the first time its happened and I am not going to be the one to give in” Josh studied her and slid his weather beaten hand across the table to take hers. “The pride of youth” he uttered, then went on to tell Anne about his own situation, about his high profile family, his wonderful education and the one love of his life, his lovely Jeanette. He, like Anne, had also been too proud and pig headed to say sorry, so had lost her forever. He had taken to travelling 43 years ago and hasn’t stopped since, he would never stop running. Anne listened intently to his story, she never interrupted him once, she saw the pain in his eyes as he mentioned Jeanette and realised what Josh was telling her rang true, she was running away, when would it stop for her. Anne loved Ben and made up her mind there and then to give him a second chance . She was not going to let pride ruin her love for him. Anne squeezed Josh’s hand tight “Thankyou my friend” she excused herself then headed down the carriage to find somewhere private to use her mobile phone. On her return she was elated, but found Josh had gone, she looked all around the swaying carriage and called out his name, the train hadn’t stopped so he couldn’t have got off. She had rang Ben and they had talked through their differences, she felt like shouting singing and dancing, but most of all she wanted to tell Josh that Ben had apologised and told her how much he loved her, her heart was soaring as she searched the whole length of the train looking for Josh. He was no where to be found. Josh was pleased with his job, being a guardian angel was the most rewarding thing he had ever done, he didn’t mind he had died, what did he have left on earth when he lost his darling Jeanette, at least now he could help others lead a good life.

==== @ Show Roundup

Outro:- That’s about it again for this week again The Prurient Lifestyle Podcast is hosted by Podbean and you can download this and previous podcasts and at prurient.podbean.com Prurient Lifestyle is also available on iTunes, Podcast Pickle & Podcast Alley and many other aggregators , just search for ‘Prurient’

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BYE… thanks for listening …

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